39: What Your Family Can Expect From Your Show Prep (...and when to step in)

Hey guys! In this episode, I offer some guidance to the loved ones that will be putting up with you during your contest prep so they are better prepared for the process. Be sure to have them give this episode a listen! 

As always, like/subscribe/and share! And come join the conversation in the private Facebook group for listeners to talk about show topics. The Facebook group is called “The ‘Everything Else’ in Bodybuilding Podcast Insiders!” so head on over there and request to join!

Additional Resources:
-FREE posing assessment and road mapping call at http://www.learntopose.com
-Want to learn skills that will help you look and feel more confident in your posing and transitions from pose to pose? Learn more at:
http://www.weeklyposing.com
-Interested in posing courses and custom made tools? Shop Here: https://learntopose.podia.com
-Want to WIN your next competition? Learn more at: http://www.posingwinsshows.com
-FREE posing tutorials for Wellness, Figure, Bikini, and Men's Physique competitors at http://www.learntopose.com
-FREE ebook “5 Things Every Bodybuilding and Fitness Competitor Needs To Know Before Preparing For A Show” at http://www.eeinbb.com
-Grab your “My Own Motivation” tank top at https://shop.killitwithdrive.com/

Key Takeaways:
*An invitation to your loved ones (3:40)
*Gaining an understanding on the overall goal (4:45)
*Red flags to look out for (7:20)
*Various costs involved with competing (9:25)
*How bodybuilding shows are judged and the importance of being prepared for the stage (11:20)
*Stage attire requirements (14:37)
*Heightened Emotions (17:16)
*Who you affiliate with will determine your experience (18:07)
*Drug tested Vs non drug tested federations (19:34)
*Why do people compete in the extreme sport of bodybuilding (22:25)

--TRANSCRIPTION--

Welcome back to the show guys! This episode I hope brings up great conversations between you and your loved ones regarding all things to expect with contest prep. I think the effect of contest prep on loved ones is underestimated and a lot of confusion and unnecessary tension can be avoided with better preparation and setting of expectations. 

I can still remember the last time I told my ex husband I wanted to compete again after a long layoff. We were sitting at dinner at a restaurant and he was drinking beer and I was drinking a glass of wine. The look on his face turned to annoyed and he in short he said he didn’t want to be in a relationship with me if I was going to compete again. He didn’t really mean he wanted a divorce, he was expressing his level of frustration towards life living with a bodybuilder in contest prep mode. 

Contest prep isn’t easy for a competitor and I think it’s often overlooked or underestimated how much contest prep affects the loved ones around you. Depending on how structured you stay on your plan year round, the added focus you will have during contest prep and the additional precision needed with nutrition and overall movement will change the entire 24/7 dynamic of your household. If you are in a division like bodybuilding, classic physique, women’s physique, and even the Figure division, your level of leanness will need to be that much greater, which will require a longer, and more precise prep for your show. The leaner you get, the longer your prep, and the more hyper focused you become, the greater the effect on those around you.  I think it’s important to prepare your loved ones for what to expect while you are preparing for a show and for you to also stay conscious about your attitude and actions during this time.  There is no need to be obnoxious to the people around you for any reason.

So today I want to offer some guidance to those loved ones that will be putting up with you during your contest prep so they are better prepared for the process. 

Hello, loved ones. My name is Michele and I have even competing, coaching, and judging bodybuilding shows for over 20 years. I’m going to be your tour guide today taking you through the process of contest prep with your loved ones so you are better prepared for what’s to come. I also want to provide you some red flags to look out for in case your loved ones get wrapped up in things that could detrimental to their health and well being in the long term.   

I also want to invite you to consider being a part in some of the process of their contest prep. Maybe help out, lend a hand to them in some way, become a part of things they are doing to prepare for their show because you are about to see a level of focus that will consume their day-to-day during the entire process and this might make you feel a little left out. 

For starters, the most important part about contest prep is adherence to a specific nutrition plan in order to get contest lean. The level of precision needed with nutrition in order to get contest lean is dependent on HOW contest lean they need to get. So the first thing you want to do is gain a better understanding what the goal look your loved ones are about to work towards with their physique. Ask them what show they are doing and which category they are competing in and let them show you an example of what a competitor looks like in that category and competition.  There are many different bodybuilding organizations and they all have different offerings. I promise you that the look of the ideal competitor is not the same across all the shows there are available. All bodybuilding organizations have different interpretations on what is ideal for each of the categories too.  So educate yourself on what exactly your loved one is about to embark on with their competition physique goals.

I also suggest you browse through the other categories in the organization your loved one plans to compete in. Check out the different looks there are for the different divisions.  You will notice that each category represents a different level of muscle size and a different level of detail to that muscle.  

If your loved one is new to competing, chances are they are competing in a division that requires a lesser degree of overall muscle and level of leanness. If your loved one carries a lot of muscle, they are likely to be in a category that requires more muscle which will also mean they will need to get a lot leaner than the average person.  The level of leanness in categories with a lot more muscle is far beyond just looking great with six pack abs on the beach.  The hot on the beach look means they aren’t lean enough for a bodybuilding show and will not score well.  To bring ones body fat levels down to the level needed to be competitive on a bodybuilding stage takes a lot of time and effort. They will need to be very precise with nutrition and activity. So if they say they need to get a workout in, they need to get a workout in.  If they have to bring their food to an event you are going to, they need to bring their pre-measured food.  If their face starts to get really gaunt and they no longer have any clothes that fit them, this is normal, and they are not sick or have an eating disorder.  There is a youtube video from my archives where I thanked on camera all of my supporters days out from a competition.  I have always been competing in divisions that required me to get extremely lean so my face in this video looks like a skeleton.  When talking about contest prep the other day to my Mom, she commented on how much of a skeleton my face looked and said she didn’t like it. Of course not, who wants to see their loved one looking emaciated?  But leanness is a part of bodybuilding.  It’s the only way to see the quality of the muscle and the level of detail that was sculpted with exercise.  The level of leanness depends on the category we compete in. If your loved one starts to look really gaunt in the face, they are most likely close to contest ready, and this is nothing to be concerned about.  After the show they will need to put body fat back on and their face will return to normal within a month or so.  

There are some red flags to look out for in their contest prep that I want to make you aware of in case they start going down a path that might become detrimental to their health and well being.  Let me first say that bodybuilding is an unregulated sport. There is no college education that teaches how to properly and safely assist someone with going from hot on the beach good looks to contest shape. Most people out there have experience as their only credential.  With enough experience you can become an expert at something, however, many people out there don’t have the history in the sport to be considered an expert. Just because they look good doesn’t mean they are educated in transforming other people into contest shape. Anyone, even you, can assist others with weight loss.  Just lower their calories and increase their activity and it’s amazing what you can do to someone that was once sedentary.  

Contest shape is not just a weight loss.  To get body fat levels down to extreme levels is a specialized skill. It takes a long time to do this, and during the process, the body will put up a fight trying to not get that lean.  Plus, the goal is to maintain as much muscle mass as possible in the process and a slower steadier approach is the only way to accomplish this.  The celery juice diet will not accomplish this.  And banning food groups is not necessary to do this either.  There is a science involved with the process of contest prep that factors in not just food but activity, sleep, stress, and hormones, to name a few.  For someone to do contest prep safely and effectively, they need to work with someone who understands human physiology to an advanced degree.  Many people out there do not have this level of knowledge and are coaching others for competition anyways.  Be aware of this.  So I would have a conversation with your loved one about their choice in coach. If they insist on working with the coach bragging about trophies and something called “pro cards” then I suggest keeping a closer eye on their progress.  By the way, a pro card is just an additional award that someone can get that allows them to start competing for money.  It’s not a lot of money and will never be enough to quit a job over and most likely won’t ever cover the costs of competing, but it’s a nice accolade, and is often used for bragging rights.

Speaking of costs, bodybuilding is not an inexpensive sport. It’s really a hobby if you ask me. Maybe a small percentage will achieve greatness on a level that provides them endorsement deals that allow them to bodybuild full time but for 99% of people it will just be a fun and expensive hobby.  I’ve equated bodybuilding to golf in the past because golf is a crazy expensive hobby that people spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on and don’t think twice. Bodybuilding might not cost hundreds of thousands like golf does, but it definitely costs thousands of dollars.  Coaching is the number one most expensive part of contest prep.  The better and more knowledgeable the coach is, the more they will charge. Contest prep coaches on average range from $100 per month to $600 per month.  The $600 per month people are the ones that either hold multiple PhDs or are coaches with many years of experience that are sought after, so their prices are reflective of demand.  

Another cost that is equally as important as the cost of a credible nutrition and training coach is learning how to perform on stage.  The #1 thing your loved one will be required to do on stage on show day is perform.  Part of the judging requires them to stand with a group of people on a taped line on stage underneath a bright set of lights where they will be required to do a series of poses for comparison of one another.  The specific poses depend on their category and organization. They will also be introduced individually to the crowd and perform a walk to and from different locations on stage where they will hit some poses along the way.  If they are in the divisions with more muscle they will also have additional muscularity poses and they will likely do a 60 second posing routine choreographed to music.  As you can see, what they do on stage and how well they do it is very important, since everything they do is compared to others and scored. 

There is no timer set up at a finish line that guarantees you are first place if you are first to cross it.  Bodybuilding scores are all opinions.  There is a judging panel that decides who on stage best represents the ideal physique for the category.  How you present yourself can either help enhance your score or cost you higher placements.  Many people have never performed on stage in their lives so some of the difficulty with presentation is the confidence, nerves, and the adrenaline that can make them perform awkwardly.  In addition, the required poses are really awkward shapes with weird contortions.  These shapes are nothing like the movements and shapes we do in every day life so learning to pose and present on stage requires a lot of practice and specific skill development from a professional that not only specializes in the posing and performance requirements for the organization and division they compete in, but someone who is also skilled in teaching people how to perform too.  Just as with contest prep coaches, the lack of regulations in bodybuilding in general means there are performance coaches with different levels of skill too.  Athletes in any sport can be awesome athletes but horrible teachers.  It’s no different in bodybuilding where just because someone is good at posing themselves doesn’t necessarily make them good at instructing and educating. 

Teaching is an art and requires specialized skills. In order to teach someone who normally slips out of a sandal walking down the street how to perform like a show stopper on stage it takes systematic instruction.  Just like with contest prep coaches, you can just add “coach” to your name and get clients. No license required. And this is risky because I can’t tell you how many times I have met a new competitor that says they have been working with a posing coach, and after seeing their posing skills, my true thoughts are that the posing is so bad that I hope they didn’t pay money to this posing coach for the instruction.  I specialize in posing and performance for all men and women categories across all organizations. I actively teach men and women in over 10 organization how to pose and perform on a regular basis. I can tell you that posing can cost 1-3 placements which totally sucks if you factor all the costs that go into competing and how much a waste that money is to get a score that is less than you could’ve gotten if you were better prepared. So don’t let them skimp on posing skills. They absolutely need it to do well on stage.  Check out my services at learntopose.com

There are also entry fees to the contest and travel expenses to factor in, especially if there is a flight and hotel involved. There are also many show day necessities you need to purchase such as specific attire to wear on stage, a very dark tan applied to the skin before the show, and even show day makeup and hair requirements. By the way, the stage tan is not a regular tan.  There is a solution applied to the skin a couple days or even the day before the show that will darken to a level that is quite extreme compared to a regular tan.  This is also normal.  For women, the stage makeup applied and the hair style is also much extra than the regular hair and makeup done on an every day basis. I always joke that my hair and makeup makes me look like a drag queen version of myself.  

Because this is a physique competition, the attire for the stage, also called “a competition suit” or “suit,” for short, must be customized to fit to your measurements, which means these suits are often hand made.  The sky is the limit on how much you can spend for a suit, but at the end of the day, the most important thing for any suit is that it fits and flatters. For women, a suit can cost as little as $300 for a hand made suit if you get a Maggie Suits suit and tell her you want a Michele Welcome suit.  My collaboration with Maggie is to make sure that anyone can get a quality suit that fits like a glove that also doesn’t break the bank.  I do not get any affiliate fees for this collaboration.  This is purely to help competitors get a suit for an affordable price.  For men your suits typically are less than $100.  However, if your loved one is competing in an organization that also require costumes, gowns, and tuxedos, this is where things can get super costly.   This is normal.  

The suits, hair, makeup, tan and accessories are all normal costs of doing a bodybuilding show and will add up so be prepared for all of these expenses. 

Ok so far you’ve learned that being in a relationship with someone competing in a bodybuilding show requires adherence to diet and training, since a competition physique is much leaner and more extreme looking than just being hot on the beach fit.  This adherence to diet and training must also be done over an extended period of time as well to allow enough time to bring body fat levels down to stage ready levels.  You’ve also learned there are many different organizations and levels of muscularity required depending on where people compete.  You are aware that performing on stage is the most important thing, really the only thing, you need to do on show day and all the scoring is 100% opinions.  And you’ve also learned there are quite a bit of expenses involved in competing that requires you to budget for and set aside money.

There are a few other considerations to be prepared for as your loved ones get ready for shows.  Some of these considerations I am going to tell you because I want you to be aware of things that might seem like red flags but are normal, and things that might be presented as normal but are actually potential red flags.

For one, emotions are going to run high. This is normal. As the process gets further and further into full swing and your loved ones get leaner and leaner, the amount of effort they put in and the changes they will see in their body will affect their everyday mindset. The focus and dedication can be stressful, even if the results are great, because it still take a lot of effort to stay focused day in and day out while also working full time jobs and/or handling everyday family obligations with the household and kids.  Plus getting super lean can be uncomfortable so there might be an undertone of irritability at times from the discomfort. By the way, no matter how lean they get,they will probably still not think they are lean enough.  The mind can play some head games as time goes on and stress levels increase.  Remind them that competing is a hobby and that they are doing everything they can to look and feel their best.   

 Another thing for you to consider as a loved one watching from the outside in is that who they affiliate with with will influence decisions.  There are many different bodybuilding organizations. There are many different coaches too.  And people are people no matter where they compete and naturally, in any sport, people are competitive.  Some coaches will only train clients for specific organizations. Some organizations will say they are the best and the other organizations don’t matter. Some competitors will think their shit don’t stink because they won a trophy or a pro card. The competitiveness of the sport and the attitudes of those your loved one affiliate with can influence their decisions.  As a loved one looking in from the outside I suggest you remind your loved one that once again bodybuilding is a hobby and on some level should always remain fun and decisions should always be in their best interest, not the interest of the coach, organization, or anyone or anything else.

One thing to note on the topic of who your loved ones affiliate with is you are going to see a lot of people walking around sporting team logos at shows.  You will hear things like, “I’m with my team.” “My team is…” This might be confusing for you as a loved one because Bodybuilding is not a team sport.   The individual takes home the trophy, and part of that trophy is their physique.  The team thing is just for fun and camaraderie.  At the end of the day, everyone that competes should make decisions that are best for them, not the team.  I repeat, bodybuilding is not a team sport. 

Another major consideration you must know about if your loved ones are competing in bodybuilding is that there are drug tested and non drug tested federations. Drug tested federations are organizations that do not allow performance enhancing drugs and will test their athletes for banned substances and disqualify anyone from competing should any banned substance be found in their system. Some drug tested organizations add an additional layer of testing by also requiring their athletes to take a polygraph test before a show and disqualify anyone that is found lying about taking performance enhancing drugs.  These drug testing measures help weed out those who use performance enhancing drugs to increase muscle size and assist with getting super lean.  Drug tested bodybuilding organizations  believe taking substances to increase muscle and decrease body fat is an unfair advantage in a competition that is scored on muscle size and level of leanness.  

Non drug tested bodybuilding organizations do not test for any performance enhancing drugs. Over the past 20 years I have been in the bodybuilding industry I have watched the amount of performance enhancing use in non drug tested federations skyrocket.  The winning physiques of competitors in these organizations has evolved greatly as a result of performance enhancing substances to the point that it is debatable whether anyone who is not using performance enhancing drugs will be competitive in these organizations no matter the division, no matter if male for female.  

Because of the common use of performance enhancing drugs, there is a nonchalant attitude towards the use of them.  As a loved one you should question any substance that is recommended to your significant other.  You should also remember that this sport is unregulated and remember what I said about coaches and how many have no formal education on human physiology.  Any chemical that is recommended should be questioned and researched.  Especially anabolic steroids of any kind.  For the women in your life, please hear me today when I say, there is not ONE safe anabolic compound.  Some compounds are said to be meant for women and safe from side effects - that is completely inaccurate.  There is no such thing an an anabolic that has zero androgenic affect (androgenic meaning male characteristics) So any anabolic will run the risk of causing male side effects in women. It will start off subtle but the thing with anabolic compounds is not the acute dose, but the dosage over time, that is the problem. You will hear that there are preferred ones for women because of the lesser degree of side effects with an acute dose, but I assure you, women are very sensitive to androgens and the level of response from taking anabolics is going to be unique to the individual and many of these side effects are permanent.  There are no short cuts to building muscle that don’t have consequences. As someone watching from the outside I recommend you be a part of these decisions and remind your loves ones that once again bodybuilding is a hobby and there is no trophy worth ones mental and physical health and overall well-being.  

As a loved one you might be wondering why on earth anyone would compete in bodybuilding.  Why does anyone compete in any extreme sport?  You learn a lot about yourself when you compete. You learn willpower, pain tolerance, structure, and the incredible capabilities of the human body to transform its shape.  It’s a challenging goal too.  Bodybuilding is an extreme sport that requires a lot of time, dedication, and patience.  The things we do to prepare for a show are really just the same things we do the rest of the year, like adhering to a nutrition plan, exercising, but just with more precision, and with a specific goal in mind.  If done right, competing can be done for many decades.  In fact many of the people I work with are in their 50s and 60s. Preparing for a show is only a small part of life but during this time it can change the dynamic of your relationship.  I hope you become involved in your loved ones journey to the competition because your support, trust, and having their back during the process I assure you will mean the world to them. I know from experience the difference this support makes. My husband today is extremely supportive and involved in everything I am doing and that adds a layer of excitement to the experience. I encourage you to do the same for your loved one.

Thanks for listening to the show! As always like, subscribe, and share to others that could benefit from listening.  And don’t forget to go to learntopose.com to find out more information about all the ways I can help with posing and presentation for both men and women in all federations and divisions.  There are some free tutorials there along with information on my signature weekly virtual group posing classes that are an absolute hit.  Again that’s learntopose.com. Till next time!